Toy News Trifecta: Wonder Woman, Speed Racer, Playmobil

af_tonner_dc_pxww_L.jpg? Tonner Doll, known for making exquisite and elaborate dolls of beloved movie and comic characters, will release a Wonder Woman…apparently dressed as some kind of exceedingly patriotic S&M queen. She’s called “Justice Protector,” but I’d prefer my retinas get protection from this fashion nightmare. Happily, there are only 300 of being made, so my chances of having to see her again is minimal.

? Lego got the Speed Racer movie license. Do you know what this means? Lego figures of Matthew Fox, John Goodman and goddamn Susan Surandon. I’m so close to making my Lego Thelma & Louise a reality!

? The new Playmobil catalogue is out, and it takes a very special kind of nerd to be excited by this. I very much am this kind of nerd. There’s a new faux-Sea World, more pirates, some dinosaurs, and more. Enjoy it here, all three of you.