Anime Masterpiece to be Remade as Crappy American Summer flick

akira1.jpeg thought you’d slip it past me, didn’t you Warner Bros.? You thought I’d be too distracted with the New York Toy Fair to notice your little announcement that you’re fast-tracking a live-action re-make of Katsuhiro Otomo’s Akira for 2009? Well, too bad, jerkfaces?I saw the Variety article.

Each feature will be based on three of the books in Otomo’s series. The story takes place in New Manhattan, a metropolis that was rebuilt after being destroyed 31 years earlier. Otomo will exec produce the films.

Graphic novel was first adapted for the bigscreen in 1988 as a popular animated film which Otomo directed. Studio has closed a seven-figure rights acquisition deal with manga publisher Kodansha and has set Ruairi Robinson to direct a script by Gary Whitta (“Book of Eli”). Andrew Lazar’s Mad Chance will produce with Appian Way’s Leonardo DiCaprio and Jennifer Davisson.

You think I wouldn’t notice the switch from Tokyo to New York? You think I wouldn’t look up who the hell Ruairi Robinson is, and discover he’s only directed commercials and short films before, and has no actual feature movie experience? You think because Leonardo DiCaprio is mentioned in the same paragraph, this means anything?

See, the reason I’m so angry is that there’s already a perfectly good movie made from the Akira manga. It’s called Akira. Grr.