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Hasbro Taunts You with G.I. Joe Movie Vehicles Which Almost Certainly Won’t Be In the Movie

Hasbro Taunts You with G.I. Joe Movie Vehicles Which Almost Certainly Won’t Be In the Movie

By February 10, 2009 Movies, Toys 0 Comment

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Wired has an exclusive first-look at some upcoming G.I. Joe vehicles which are definitely from the movie line, but are almost  just as definitely not in the movie. First things first: note the G.I. Joe logo on the Ice Dagger (top) is the new movie Joe logo, and the Nightraven (bottom) has Destro’s MARS logo (also notice that there’s no room for a figure on the Nightraven, which means it must be an unmanned recon plane of something, but that’s neither here nor there) (yeah, that clearly is a drop-down cockpit, guys. My bad. I thought it was landing gear).

Now as we know, the focus of the movie will be on the speedsuited Joes, which means while the Nightraven has a shot of being seen, I doubt we’ll get to see the Ice Dagger in action — the fact that Frostbite has on something like his regular outfit and not a dumb winter-themed speedsuit backs me up, I think. Wired also has shots of the Rockslide n’ Snow Job set, as well as a Cobra Hummer, if you want to check ’em out.

And call me crazy, but the fact that the Joe’s vehicle — even one suited for winter climates — is cornflower blue is almost the most awful thing I’ve seen from the movie yet. Blue is Cobra’s color, you assholes. Thanks to Brett for the tip.

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Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.