Twilight Barbies Are Proof that God Hates Us
Look at them.
LOOK AT THEM
You cannot look at Sparkly Ken and tell me there is a loving god who’s watching over us. No loving god would allow this glittery nightmare to come to pass.
On the other hand, get a little bit of red kool-aid and you can re-enact Edward and Bella’s tender love scene pretty easily.
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About The Author
Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.