An Ode to Mer-Man’s Corn Sword

As you may know, the original Masters of the Universe Mer-Man figure — in addition to looking nothing like he did on his card back — came with a sword that looked not even slightly unlike an ear of corn attached to a handle. Frankly, there’s actual corn that looks less like corn that the sword does. At any rate, some fabulous soul penned a soulful ballad to Mer-Man’s sword, which frequent TR contributor Jason “Poe Ghostal” Clarke found while googling the phrase “corn sword,” which is possibly both the bravest and stupidest thing I’ve ever heard of. Enjoy, my friends. Enjoy.