Movies, Nerdery

The Most Awful Nerd in America Found

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statue_ggiant_chewie.jpg

?Warming Glow notified me of this, yet I could not thank him for it. Nor will you thank me, but it does need to be seen. This is a recent NY Craigslist ad in its entirety (and yes, the fact that it’s a Craiglist ad should be enough to tip off you more sensitive souls that you should stop reading right this instant lest you be incredibly disturbed):

Need an amputee to complete my Halloween costume (Brooklyn)

So this might seem strange and really offensive to some but hopefully
someone will reply. I have always loved the scene in Empire Strikes
Back where Chewbacca has to carry around a half reconstructed C3PO in a
backpack because he hasn’t reattached his lower body yet. For Halloween
I would love to dress up like this. I am big enough and strong enough
to both pull off the Chewbacca look and to carry around a lot of weight
for the night. So basically I am looking for a double amputee (someone
missing both legs – preferably at the hip) to accompany me as C3PO for
the evening. We should meet ahead of time so that we can work out the
backpack/harness system. There are a few parties that I want to hit and
I think we will be the hit of any event we attend. Anyone up for this?


This is real. It happened. I’ve had some time to think about this, and I’ve decided that it is more disturbing and upsetting than 95% of what I’ve posted on Fan Fiction Fridays. It may be higher, actually, because after reading this I don’t think I’ll ever be clean.

About Author

Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.