Adult Swim Has Lost Their Minds
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?So. You watch Metalocalypse? You know Dethklok’s blood fountain? Well, Adult Swim is now offering it for sale on their website. For $40,000. For real.
Are you the world’s biggest Metalocalypse fan?
No, really, their BIGGEST fan? Well, time to put your money where your
mouth is by blowing all of that filthy, dirty cash you have lying
around on this incredibly decadent purchase: a perfect replica of the
fountain that decorates the nightmarish foyer of Dethklok’s luxurious
and deadly estate. Nothing will boast your dedication to animated
death-metal more than this disgustingly lavish and entirely unnecessary
conversation piece squatting in your front yard. It will also do your
neighbors the courtesy of informing them that yes, you are 100%
balls-out crazy. Both shipping (and, of course, blood) are not
included.CLICK HERE TO CONTACT US IF INTERESTED; SERIOUS INQUIRIES ONLY
- Order a replica of Dethklok’s fountain
- Marble fountain; approx. 66″ in height, 96″ basin diameter
- 8-12 weeks production time
- Ships anywhere in North America or the Caribbean
- Price does NOT include shipping, will vary by location
- $13,000 security deposit required upon purchase to weed out the jokers
- Fountain is non-refundable
- Seriously, this is real
I… yeah. I have no words, I just needed to let you know about this insanity to make sure I’m not hallucinating it or anything.
About The Author
Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.