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Oh No Godzilla


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?From Entertainment Weekly:

The giant Japanese monster is getting the Hollywood treatment — again.
This time Legendary Pictures will do an American Godzilla movie,
based on Toho Company’s legendary monster. The studio, which is behind
the upcoming Clash of the Titans, has made it clear it won’t be
a sequel to the 1998 film that Sony and Roland Emmerich made. (That
movie starring Matthew Broderick grossed close to $400 million
worldwide.) Rather, it will be a re-imagining of the original Godzilla
movies. Legendary has plans to announce a director for the film soon.
The movie — which Legendary hopes to release in 2012 — will be a
co-production and co-financing deal with Warner Bros, and Toho will
distribute the film in Japan.

AAAAAAAA FUCK EVERYBODY IN THE ASS WITH MATTHEW BRODERICK. After the fucking debacle that was Roland “Like Michael Bay But Shittier” Emmerich’s 1998 U.S. Godzilla — a film that, I might remind you, featured Godzilla HIDING AMONG THE BUILDINGS IN MANHATTAN and more running around from Jurassic Park wanna-be’s than actual Godzilla — NO ONE BESIDES JAPAN SHOULD EVER BE ALLOWED TO MAKE A GODZILLA MOVIE. I don’t care that Emmerich isn’t involved or that Toei supposedly is, this is just rubbing Japan’s faces in our horrible contempt of their genuinel;y good pop culture. This is like we Japan invited us over for dinner and then we raped Japan’s mom… then waited until the next morning and raped Japan’s grandmother. Oh, and I totally forgot about the CG Astro Boy! So we woke up in the middle of the night to sodomize Japan’s little brother, too. No wonder they keep making cartoons about naked teenage furry girls who are also military aircraft and shipping them over here. We have it coming, and a lot worse besides.