Dear Minions: Buy This Lightcycle for Me, Stat


?Dear Topless Roboteers: I appreciate you all sending me this ebay listing for a full functional, street-legal lightcycle from the upcoming Tron: Legacy movie. I know you know I’m greatly looking forward to the movie, and it makes sense that I would enjoy seeing this listing. However, you all are not taking into account the fact that I’m really, really looking forward to Tron: Legacy, and thus seeing a lightcycle that I could theoretically own had I the money is actually pure anguish. There’s only one solution here, and that’s for one of you bastards to buy it for me. It’s still at $35,000, which is pretty reasonable, I think, for making a man on the internet that virtually none of you have ever met happy. If you all want to pool your resources together, and present it to me as a group gift, I’m okay with that too. In fact, if you guys get me this, you all don’t have to get me anything for Christmas.