Alert and sober Topless Roboteer Bruce E. alerted me to the fact that Hasbro finally updated the G.I. Joe: Renegades section at their Hub website, with a few screenshots (which look fine, FYI) and some character designs and bios that are… well… odd. I don’t mean that in a bad way or a good way — they’re just… weird. Consider this you spoiler warning, because the bullet points below are all things I thought were notable:
? Cobra Commander, shown above, apparently doesn’t exist except on video. Weird. As is his half-helmet thing. He’s also named Adam de Cobray, which used to be the Baroness’ last name, right?
? Because Tunner Rat is skilled in tunnels, apparently this makes him an expert on worms. Huh?
? Flint is not part of G.I. Joe, but the leader of the team assigned to catch G.I. Joe. Because G.I. Joe are Renegades.
? General Abernathy is Flint’s boss, and inexplicably has a mohawk.
? Because Cobra is apparently a well-known, seemingly non-evil company in Renegades’ world, the Baroness is their PR director when she’s not being evil. Also her name is Anastasia Cisarovna.
? For reasons unknown, Storm Shadow has apparently wrapped his head in toilet paper.
? Dr. Mindbender’s name is Brian Bender. Seriously.
? Apparently, Cobra took over MARS Industries and not only forces Destro to supply Cobra with weapons, but CC also forces him to wear his metal mask. He seems like he hates Cobra, which kind of freaks me out.
See? None of that is bad, per se — well, maybe Storm Shadow’s toilet paper mask — but it is all really… weird. Different. I don’t mind, but I’m not 100% how it’ll all work. You can check out all the character designs and bios here, if you’re so inclined.