Miscellaneous, Movies

Joss Whedon’s Official Statement on the New Buffy Debacle

0

joss-whedon-demons.jpg

?There’s nothing I can really add to it, so here’s Whedon’s statement, made to E Online‘s Kristen Do Santos, in full:

Kristin,
I’m glad you asked for my thoughts on the announcement of Buffy the
cinema film.  This is a sad, sad reflection on our times, when people
must feed off the carcasses of beloved stories from their youths–just
because they can’t think of an original idea of their own, like I did
with my Avengers idea that I made up myself.

Obviously I have strong, mixed emotions about something like this. My
first reaction upon hearing who was writing it was, “Whit Stillman AND
Wes Anderson?  This is gonna be the most sardonically adorable movie
EVER.”  Apparently I was misinformed. Then I thought, “I’ll make a
mint!  This is worth more than all my Toy Story residuals combined!”
Apparently I am seldom informed of anything. And possibly a little slow.
But seriously, are vampires even popular any more?

I always hoped that Buffy would live on even after my death.  But,
you know, AFTER.  I don’t love the idea of my creation in other hands,
but I’m also well aware that many more hands than mine went into making
that show what it was. And there is no legal grounds for doing anything
other than sighing audibly. I can’t wish people who are passionate about
my little myth ill. I can, however, take this time to announce that I’m
making a Batman movie.  Because there’s a franchise that truly needs
updating. So look for The Dark Knight Rises Way Earlier Than That Other
One And Also More Cheaply And In Toronto, rebooting into a theater near
you.

Leave me to my pain!  Sincerely, Joss Whedon.

Nicely done, sir.

About Author

Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.