Miscellaneous, Nerdery

TR Contest: Nerd Torture



?Screw the rambling intro — this week’s contest is nerd torture. There are two categories here — either ways you can think up to torture a nerd, or ways you, as a nerd, have been tortured. A few clarifications:

? Obviously, I’m looking for mental anguish more than physical anguish.
? These should not be bad single occurrences, they should be torture. They should be lingering and painful and leave the torturee powerless to avoid his/her fate. No waking up to find mom sold your He-Man toys at a garage sale. But if your mom forced you to sell your own He-Man toys at a garage sale, over the course of one awful day, that would be torture.
? For the “Create a torture” category, you can suggest tortures for nerds in general, or specific types of nerds, like Trekkies, role-players, etc.

Everyone gets ONE ENTRY FOR EACH CATEGORY. I.e., you get two entries as long as one of them is thinking up a nerd torture, and one is a tale of past nerd torture. Got it? If you’re not writing entries for both, you should only be writing one. The contest ends on Monday at 12:01 am EST on Monday, November the 15th.Have a great weekend, and don’t forget to clean out your fishtanks.

About Author

Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.