George Lucas Is Now Officially Lying to Himself

Here’s a wacky little revelation from George Lucas, from an interview with the Hollywood Reporter:

The controversy over who shot first, Greedo or Han Solo, in Episode IV,
what I did was try to clean up the confusion, but obviously it upset
people because they wanted Solo to be a cold-blooded killer, but he
actually isn’t. It had been done in all close-ups and it was confusing
about who did what to whom. I put a little wider shot in there that made
it clear that Greedo is the one who shot first, but everyone wanted to
think that Han shot first, because they wanted to think that he actually
just gunned him down.

So Han Solo never shot first, eh? All right. I guess we’ll just ignore what we actually saw in the movie that was released in 1977, and all the TV broadcasts between then and the special editions, and also the VHS releases during that time, and also that non-anamorphic widescreen DVD release you crapped out a few years ago, and then the YouTube video above. Yes, all those things clearly and empirically show Han shooting first — mainly because Greedo never fires at all, and thus cannot possibly be first in a race he didn’t enter — but because obviously we should trust a single comment made by George Lucas in 2012, which he never felt worth clarifying in the 20 years between the original release of Star Wars in 1977 and the Special Edition in 1997, nor anytime in the 15 years since then. That… that makes sense.

Honestly, this isn’t George Lucas being oddly obtuse anymore, it’s him being insane. Nerd ladies and gentlemen, it is official; we need to stop being mad at Lucas and start pitying him, because the man is at best
delusional, and more likely losing his mind.