Death Comes to Jeor Mormont’s Church
I’m really, really excited about Darksiders II — as I learned in the original, I don’t care so much about decent character designs when I get to shoot angels with a magic bazooka — but this “Last Sermon” promo for the game isn’t doing anything for me. Sure, it’s expensive, and stars Game of Thrones‘ James Cosmo (who plays Jeor “Old Bear” Mormont, Commander of the Knight’s Watch), but it takes Darksiders way too seriously. I mean, the game works in that it’s about Death, who has long hair, no mouth, no shirt, big spiked kneepads, and two ridiculously gigantic tonfa-sword-things. It’s exactly what a nerdy 12-year-old boy takes seriously when he draw a “bitchin’ Death” on his Trapper Keeper. No need to add respected actors like Cosmo or throw around Revelations quotes better said by Johnny Cash into the mix. Think of it this way — imagine Cosmo shaking hands with Death as he’s designed in Darksiders II. Embarrassing for everyone, isn’t it?
About The Author
Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.