I’ve not really mentioned Fifty Shades of Grey, the best-selling BDSM “mommy porn” trilogy, but it makes me so, so sad. This is because it first came to life as a fucking Twilight fan fic, when the author changed the name of Bella Swan to the equally stupid Anastasia Steele, turned Sparkles the vampire into some kind of young business owner, wrote about them fucking S&M style a lot and basically sold a jillion copies. The more I think about this, the more suicide looks less like a desperate escape from reality and more like a rational response to the world we live in.
But that’s not the weird part, at least today. Because American Psycho author Bret Easton Ellis has announced he really, really wants to adapt Fifty Shades for its inevitable movie version. Seriously.
I can’t even begin to process this. On one hand, Ellis could very possibly take what I’m fairly confident is an awful soft-core bondage porn novel and make something brilliant and fucked up out of it (it should be noted he’d like David Cronenberg to direct). On the other hand, are you prepared to live in a world where a genuinely excellent, erotic movie is spawned from some goddamn Twilight
fan fiction? I’m not. (Via /Film