Miscellaneous, Nerdery

TR Contest: You’re the Boss

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suntory boss.jpg

I’m ready for this week to be over, so let’s get right to it:

You’re the boss. You’ve been hired, promoted, blackmailed somebody, found a magic genie, something — but suddenly you are the boss of one nerdy company and/or property. You are completely in charge. You decide who works on the project, and gets hired or fired. You control every and any aspect of the product, from price, to marketing, to construction, to whatever. It can be a videogame company, a toy company, a comic company, a movie studio, a TV station, a showrunner — whatever. Your contest: Tell me what nerdy thing you would want to be in charge of and why.
For me, the choice is easy. I would want control of Masters of the Universe. Forget running Mattel, I just want to make genuinely good figures at a decent price point. I don’t want to them to be needlessly beholden to the original terrible toys (i.e. looking dumb) and if I’m going to charge $30 for them, I want them to be individually sculpted.
But I could go on all weekend (…and I often have). Obviously, these entries require some explanations and details, but please try to keep them trim. One entry per person — you only have time to be in charge of one thing or company. Please note, this contest take places in the present — so if you take over LucasFilm, you can’t stop the prequels from having been made, for example, but you could order them all recalled and destroyed. The contest ends at 12:01 am EST on Monday, June 11th. Have a great weekend, folks, and try not to take over anyone with your tits or be taken over by somebody’s tits. I know it’s hard, but it’s nice to make the effort anyways.

About Author

Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.