I’ve watched the trailer three times now, and I still have no idea. The problem is that I don’t know if the film knows how fucking dumb it is or not; if it has the slightest bit of self-awareness about its ludicrous premise, its godawful story, and insanely awful dialoge, that’s one thing — but if it doesn’t, and it believes its actually a really cool movie about two badass siblings who fight witches with weapons Hugh Jackman’s Van Helsing would find overelaborate, well… fuck. All I know is that there appears to be a witch with a gatling gun. But is that so dumb it’s awesome, or so dumb it shoots right past awesome and ends up dumb again? I have no idea!
Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.