Star Wars Angry Birds Is Confusing

So many questions:

1) Does anger still lead to the dark side?
2) If so, does this mean all the birds are going to turn into Sith?
3) And if the piggies aren’t angry, doesn’t this technically make the piggies the good guys?
4) What are the piggies stealing in this scenario, anyways? Are Luke, Leia and Han having copies amounts of babies that the Empire is stealing?
5) How is George Lucas going to show scenes of people getting their hands chopped off if no one has any hands?