TV, Zombies

TV Trifecta: Jason Voorhees, Blackbeard and Michael Bay

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“What is ‘Three People Who’ve Ruined Childhoods,’ Alex?”

Friday the 13th was a series once before, but weirdly, it had nothing whatsoever to do with the movies besides the name, as it focused on the finding of haunted antiques. This time around, Friday the 13th is taking a page out of the books of Hannibal and Bates Motel, focusing on the Voorhees family and the people of Crystal Lake in multiple time periods. Just in case you don’t get your fix of hockey masks, blood and guts from, y’know, actual hockey.

-John Malkovich. Artery slashing. Silly English accent. I already like this Blackbeard better than the one in Pirates of the Caribbean 4. Even if he doesn’t have an actual black beard.

-And here’s The Last Ship, in which Michael Bay ends the world with a virus, but still fantasizes that Americans and Russians will be shooting at one another afterwards and yelling “Yeah, baby!” like Austin Powers. Unusually for Bay, it seems to feature a female protagonist (Rhona Mitra) who isn’t in her 20s.

The Last Ship Promo from Bob Chirum on Vimeo.

About Author

Luke Y. Thompson has been writing professionally about movies and pop-culture since 1999, and has also been an actor in some extremely cheap culty and horror movies you will probably never hear much about (he is nonetheless mostly proud of them, as he met his wife on one). As editor of The Robot's Voice since 2012, he can take the blame for the majority of the site's content, all of which he creates because he loves you very, very much. (Although he loves nachos more. Sorry.) Prior to TRV, Luke wrote for publications that include the New Times LA, Los Angeles CityBeat, E! Online, OC Weekly, Geekweek, GeekChicDaily, The L.A. Times, The Village Voice, LA Weekly, and Nerdist