So Many Ironies: Triple H Voices the Hulk in Botched Marvel Touring Experience Hated by Fans

WWE’s Triple H was once rumored to play Thor. He has repeatedly fought a guy named Hulk. His most famous ex-girlfriend Chyna played She-Hulk in a porno. And now he gets to voice the Incredible Hulk – in the Marvel Experience interactive touring attraction (not be confused with the live touring stunt show Marvel Universe LIVE!).

You might think to yourself, why hire a guy who is hated by fans for being clueless to his viewers’ desires and arrogant enough to assume we want to see far more of him than we actually do? Well, it’s revealed as a pretty perfect match once you read the Yelp reviews of the show…

Let me add to the other reviews that mention the endless lines, malfunctioning exhibits, poorly trained staff, ridiculous refreshment prices, unadvertised parking fees and no warning that purses and strollers are not allowed inside. We were there on the infamous first Saturday, however, and I understand that there may be early glitches, and other excuses for Marvel to have robbed us of $100+.

Here’s another reason they suck: my husband was injured in one of the only experiences that was functional that day. I will fully admit that it was his fault, thinking he could be more flexible than his frame allows. The security and EMT staff were very kind and prompt. The husband ended up in the ER, but fortunately his injuries were not too serious.

In short, Disney made “circle vision” in the 60’s and it was WAY BETTER than anything I saw in my 2 hours in this cheap scam to sell marvel apparel.

If you had a kid, who was 6, MAYBE they would enjoy it… MAYBE.

Save time and money with the Marvel Home Experience… here’s how in 7 easy steps!

1. Stand in a corner for an hour.

2. Setup your favorite light gun game… I like Duck Hunt. Stand approximately 20 feet away from the light gun for an 1 hour.

3. Play the light gun game for 5 minutes.

4. Walk around your house for 30 minutes trying to decide on a thing that you don’t want to wait for the next hour to do.

5. strap a lcd monitor to your ceiling, and put in an animated Marvel movie. Anyone will do it doesn’t really matter. Watch that movie for 10 minutes or until your neck gets too sore to continue… whichever comes first.

6. Sit in a chair and continue to watch that movie while rocking back and forth. Spray some compressed air in your face 4 – 5 times.

7. Go online to Skymall.com and look at overpriced crap. Don’t buy anything.

4D just means you’re entering a Dollar-Deducting Disappointment Dome. Run for your lives! Keep your $34/person in your wallet. Parking is an extra $10. The most fun we had was laughing while reading bad-funny Yelp reviews about The Marvel Experience during the endless wait for Nothing Much. Thank God our tickets were comped. Kill me now.

We tried to register our wrist bands which was a waste of time because the machines kept messing up due to the sunlight. As I scanned my band to participate in the activities, another person’s information appeared instead of my own. Fail.

Somehow, Triple H’s involvement suddenly makes a lot of sense.

video h/t: ComicBook.com