Menu

First-Person Cat Simulator Game Catlateral Damage Debuts Full Version


catlateraldamage.jpg

This game, in its simple browser-playable form, first crossed my radar in January of last year. It was a fun distraction – sort of like EVERYTHING is to a cat – but anyone with a mother-in-law like mine could have told you it wasn’t going to meet the demand crazy cat people have for more stuff that caters to them.

Just knocking shit off shelves? Insufficient! Now you can choose your cat, get power-ups, and do some real damage in places like a museum and supermarket. Unlike in real life, where people call you terrible names, you will never get punished because you are too cute.

I don’t see any level where you scream at your owner incessantly for attention while he’s trying to type up an article on deadline, and then run away when he tries to pet you in response, but that would make a great bonus. Check below for the unique press release…and the trailer, which features a shirtless fat orange dude wielding a hammer. I’m not kidding.

For Immediate Release
Catbridge, MA, May, 18, 2015 – Mew meow CATLATERAL DAMAGE meow meow-ow Steam mew OUYA! Meow-ow mew mrow meow mew meow mew meow mew mew meow-ow, mew mew meow mrow mew mew meow meow-ow meow mew mrow meow meow! Mew mew meow meow-ow meow mew meow mrow mrow meow-ow mew mew mew. Meow-ow mew, meow meow mew meow mew mrow mew mew meow-ow mew mew meow.

Meow-ow mew meow meow Wed May 27th mew meow mew meow mew mew meow-ow, mew mew mrow mrow mew meow meow-ow meow mew meow meow! Mew mew meow meow-ow meow mew meow meow-ow mew mew mew mrow. Meow-ow mew, meow meow mew meow mew meow mew mew meow-ow mew mew meow. Purrrr… Meow raaarowwww meow.

Me-meow mew mew meow meow-ow meow mew catlateraldamage.com!