Ask Luke’s Mother-in-Law: Good Gravy, Baked in a Pie


Martha Boyd is not just Luke’s mother-in-law – she’s also an ex-cop, a landlord, a self-described crazy cat lady, a major Star Trek geek and the widow of a green beret. So go ahead: ask her anything. And we mean anything. Either comment below with your question, or email boydappraisal at yahoo.

Here we are back at Thursday again. LYT said it was okay to go on doing more of the things I find to eat from the 99 cent store – just not every week. So I was good and did not do one last week. But (drum roll) you get 2 for the price of one this week as I will be comparing. Two different forms of biscuits and gravy. Yep, you can get this tasty treat in a frozen food variety and then for a scant dollar.

The first one is by Larry the Cable guy. Now hopefully Southern cooking by a redneck comic should be good. Well…it was not roadkill. It was pretty good. Two decent-size biscuits and white gravy. It was a bit light on the gravy for my liking, but adequate. Microwave and you get a single serving. The second was not really biscuits and gravy but a gravy pie. From the folks at Banquet who have been feeding us chicken pies for years, now comes a gravy pie. It is the same crust as the pot pies, but filled with white gravy. Lots of gravy and if you break up the crust you have really flat biscuits. Again, microwave and you get a single serving. I liked the Banquet one just a little better – seems to have had just a bit more gravy. Both I would purchase again. They made a great change from my typical morning bagel.


This week you all were busy question askers. Thank you. So here we go for this week’s wild ride.

Gallen Dugall:

QUESTION! A long time ago a musical group known as The Carpenters asked an important question “Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near?” and while the person the song is asking this question about is never named (possibly Sam Wilson) I always felt the most obvious answer was “They possess mental command of avians, RUN!” What is you’re opinion on this subject?

I am a big Carpenters fan. This was one of my most favorite songs and I preformed it a couple of times at Disneyland and a few other places. Even since the movie The Birds, I never really liked birds suddenly appearing. Never really thought it was a good omen if birds and people showed up at the same time. Maybe they appeared because the person approaching was wearing a bird seed hat.

Joseph Lex:

Hey, Ms. Martha. I’m the poster formerly known as ChaosLex on the old boards. Haha.

All joking aside, I have a serious law enforcement question for you. Some scumbag named B.U.T.T._V9 on Instagram (please note this account has been closed but he might’ve opened other accounts) was posting videos of himself torturing and mutilating household pets.

Howard Stern (while a shock jock, also a big softie when it comes to cats, dogs, etc.) spoke with an FBI agent who told him there really wasn’t anything they could do. I know the Internet brings a lot of anonymity, but surely there’s something that can be done to track down this guy, right?

I would think that there was something that could and should be done. The FBI has a great cyber section and I’m sure they could track the IP and the guy down, and if they don’t want to do anything they could give it to the local agency and have it looked into. If the guy is dumb enough to post this to the Internet, he is most likely bragging about it elsewhere and it will be only a matter of time before he talks about it to the wrong person who will turn it in to local police. This is a crime and people are arrested for it all of the time.

Joseph Lex
On a lighter note, have you heard of the Blind Cat Rescue & Sanctuary in the Carolinas? If not, you should check out this link. smile emoticon

They’re a non-profit rescue with separate areas for blind cats, FIV+ cats and FELV+ cats. None of their cats are available for adoption (they feel they’ve suffered enough and don’t want to risk them ever being taken to a shelther again) but they live like kings and queens. Their live webcam runs 24/7, so I definitely recommend checking it out.

Yes, I had heard of them and thanks for making mention. It is so good that they all have a forever home.


Who is your favorite My Little Pony, and why?

My fav is Fluttershy as she cares for the animals and represents kindness. I love her pink hair.


John Zoidberg:

Hello! I love your weekly posts, I only just started getting a chance to read them recently, but while I’m not sure how long LYT’s been giving you the forum, I’m just glad he did. I am delighted in anything cat lover’s put out there and your grey and white cat resting on what looks like rocks behind him is adorable! Anyway, sorry if someone has asked you this question before, but my QUESTION is this: what are your cats’ favorite type of tv shows/movies, if any? My parents had a cat once who loved nature shows specifically about bears of any kind. He would run up the tv and paw at the screen, he’d get so excited. And I had a cat who used to love to watch Babylon 5 with me, to the exclusion of any other sci-fi shows that I also watched. He was devastated (moreso than I) when the show was over.

The grey and white one is Mr. Frizzy and yes, the pillow is a rock. He got his name because when he was a baby he had short and long hair so it looked like he had put his paw in a light socket. Thus frizzy. Anyway his fave program is football and especially the Super Bowl. Frizzy and my husband used to sit in the recliner for every game and the Super Bowl. After my husband died, no one sat in the recliner and we did not watch Super Bowl until last year. As soon as the game started, Frizzy got into his recliner and stayed for the whole game. Even ate his treats in the chair. As soon as the game ended he got up. The chair is vacant again.

The other kids love to watch cooking shows with me, especially Hell’s Kitchen.

John Zoidberg:

Another question – someone already asked you about your favorite junk food or snacks, but do your cats ever get people food and if so, what are their favorite snacks or junk food preferences? We’ve had several cats in recent years that love plain potato chips. It’s funny to watch them eat people food sometimes, but obviously in very small quantities.

Yes my little ones do eat people food. They love the salt on chips, lick it off and leave the chip, cheese dip, and lollipops – apple flavor is the best.

Gallen Dugall

QUESTION! Star Trek Online welcomed its first lesbian Klingon couple last week in the episode “House Pegh” when players were introduced to two minor characters. Minor but highly stereotypical, with one being ultra butch (Trevana) and the other (B’Eler) being very dainty… well, for a Klingon. I found it slightly more off putting than refreshing. A matter of fact presentation can easily come across as either “patronizing hand holding” or “gottcha shock value” instead of expedient and condensed story telling.

It’s almost (not quite) that you’re told, “and over there are the lesbian Klingons”, when that’s not really the most important thing about those characters when you’re introduced. It was a bit of a fail considering I was more clear on their sexual orientation than I was about their roles in the life-or-death mission we were about to depart on.

On the other hand stereotypes are useful for quickly establishing characters and do have at least some incidental basis in reality so why not just let these two fit the mold? At what point does the use of stereotypes to establish characters, ranging from gender roles to professional tropes like “cops with donuts”, cross the line from expedient presentation into insulting denegration?

Totally agree – I don’t really see the need to continually use stereotypes – lazy writing.


Gallen Dugall:

QUESTION! Looking at your pic of the “OK Corral”, across from which in an empty lot the famous gunfight took place between the Daltons and Earps, I am reminded that in spite of the dozens of gunfights Wyatt Earp was involved in he was never so much as scratched by a bullet, even with bullets passing through his clothing on occassion. Statistical variance for shots fired in anger verses effect suggests this sort of fluke luck is inevitable, but it also seems to be incredibly common as well having many historical analogs in major wars – Richard Winters of WWII’s EZ company being another well documented example.

Luck, destiny, statistical probablity, or divine intervention? Do you think that there might be some common thread to account for one person emerging unscathed from a fight while another falls?

I think it is a lot of luck. In my case I think I have used 3 of my nine lives. I have had 3 patrol cars ambushed and shot full of holes. Me, not a scratch. After the 3rd one I got out of patrol and now even given that I am back volunteering I’m sticking behind a desk, though I have been asked to go back out in a car eventually. I would much rather take my chances with a paper cut at my age.

Gallen Dugall:

Demand pics of your MLP purchases so I can live vicariously through you.

I will have them for you in next week’s work. I already had a bunch for this week. Will also share the Simpsons and Hello Kitty fabric.

So friends, we come to the end of another week. I hope I answered everything. Anyone watching Whispers? It is on a bit late for me but what I have seen so far looks pretty good. Well anyway that’s it for this week . As always be good to each other and Huggs. Catch you all new week.

P.S. happy summer vacation. Today is the last day of school in my neck of the woods. All my teacher friends are doing the happy dance.

As always, keep your questions coming, be they foolish, philosophical or anything else! Any questions submitted in comments below – or emailed to Martha directly for publication – will be included in future columns.