Cartoons, Movies, Toys

The G.I. Joe Movie Hates You


IESB claims it has a picture of Sienna Miller as the Baroness in the live-action G.I. Joe movie, and I forbid anyone from being surprised by the results. Remember, please, that the Baroness is supposed to look like this:

And here’s the pic of Miller:

Note the lack of glasses, the blonde hair, and the American flag she’s holding, which could lead one to think she probably doesn’t have a sexy Slavic accent. I certainly didn’t think the G.I. Joe movie was going to get much right, what with the international team and so forth, but I did think them competent enough to keep the Baroness’ hair black. My bad.

About Author

Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.