The Great Debate: Should Dragon People Have Tits?

Brilliant and vivacious TR reader High On Markers, having read my recent confession regarding D& D and Drizzt Do’Urden, sent me a link to make me feel better?specifically, one I’m not part of, as it’s a 15-page forum thread discussion about whether female “Dragonborns,” i.e., dragon people, should have breasts. It’s a tragedy of the highest scale, as these people debate the “reality” of dragon boobies, the pros and cons, and do an absolutely terrifying amount of research to make their positions. The Badgerbag blog has a great rundown of the highlights, but here’s my general rundown of the thread:

? It is first claimed that Dragonborn should not have breasts, as reptiles don’t produce milk for their young
? The problem of distinguishing between female and male Dragonborn without breasts is raised
? The platypus’ milk-giving and egg-laying is mentioned
? Some posit male and female Dragonborn should be displayed by crests
? It’s pointed out that although platypuses produce milk, they don’t have breasts
? It’s debated if dragons are reptiles or something else
? It’s pointed out that many female non-humanoids (e.g. Martians) have breasts, as if this was a “fact” in support of something
? HOLY FUCK WHAT IS THIS INSANITY

And that’s the first page, people. Of 15. While the thread does make me feel better about myself, I’ve kind of lost all hope for humanity. If anyone needs me, I’ll be running my car and spraying cans of hairspray wildly into the air, hopefully hurrying our eventual extinction.