Blu-ray

DVD Day: April 29th, 2008

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51kzTsddDHL._SS500_.jpg? The Golden Compass
The movie no one saw of the book many people read. How often does that happen?

? The Adventures of Young Indiana Jones Volume Three
I totally forgot Anne Heche was in this. That really freaks me out.

? All Monsters Attack
This 2001 Godzilla movie, and I quote from Amazon here, “re-imagines the beast as a mythical creature harboring the souls of the Japanese victims of World War II.” That is beyond fucked up. Regardless, this is one of those really nice Godzilla DVDs, as is, Terror of Mechagodzilla, which is also out today.

? Sabrina the Teenage Witch: The Animated Series
100% Melissa Joan Hart free.

? Death Note Volume 4
I tell you, Death Note is good shit, and the best newanime I’ve seen in a long, long time. I wanted to tell you in case you’re one of the five anime fans who didn’t download it three years ago.

? Lone Wolf & Cub TV Volume 1
A ’70s show from Japan about a samurai and his baby working as assassins? Yes, please!

? The Beast in Space
So I was actually sent a copy of The Beast in Space last week, so I wanted to let you guys know if you’re looking for a beyond low-budget Italian sci-fi film full of full frontal nudity, insanity and ’80s soft-core Italian sex, you’re probably looking for The Beast in Space. There’s a hero with a pencil thin mustache, a possibly gay Han Solo, several women in states of undress, a planet that makes people have sex, virtually no continuity, a crowd of gay male robots in blond Prince Valiant wigs, terrible special effects (they don’t even try with the lasers; people just fall down), stock footage of horses having sex, and a woman having with both the titular beast and a robot. It was wonderful. My favorite is when the crew lands on the sex planet to be immediately menaced by a robot, run back into the spaceship, then exit again about 30 seconds later and the robot’s gone and not even mentioned. Incidentally, despite the cover, there is no centaur, but the naked lady is pretty accurate.

About Author

Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.