The Batman 3 Rumors Continue to Get Stupider

Despite the fact that Warner Bros. only last week offered Chris Nolan the job to direct Batman 3, and that Nolan is still thinking about it, the Batman 3 villain rumors are still flying. But while the rumors in America center around reasonable choices like Johnny Depp playing the Riddler or Philip Seymour Hoffman playing the Penguin, the British have just gone off the fucking deep end. First, they said that Angelina Jolie?an American rumor for the role of Catwoman?was consulting with porn star Tera Patrick on the role. They also interviewed Julie Newmar, who said “her sources” said Jolie was a heavy favorite, despite the fact that Newmar’s sources are her cats Mr. Whiskers and Matthew M. Meowington. Now…now they’re not even trying.

A studio executive said: “Cher is Nolan’s first choice to play Catwoman. He wants to her to portray her like a vamp in her twilight years.

The 62-year-old singer and actress is reported to be in talks to play Catwoman opposite Christian Bale in the third Batman film from British director Christopher Nolan.

Thus reports the Telegraph, which also says Depp has been cast, and that the film will be titled The Caped Crusader. I’m trying to think of a stupider casting decision to report as fact, but with the possible of exception of Dustin Hoffman in full-Tootsie drag, I think Cher tops the list. Well done, Telegraph. We’re all stupider for your efforts.