Flash Thompson’s Gonna Bite It

The L.A. Times says Spider-man’s first bully Flash Thompson is apparently going to die in Iraq as a soldier. Says Geoff Boucher:

I just got off the phone with Marc Guggenheim, one of the writers of Marvel’s “The Amazing Spider-Man” series (and also the co-creator of the ABC series “Eli Stone”), who said that issue No. 574 is going to jolt fans with its harrowing look at the life of an American soldier in the urban combat zones of Iraq. And not just any soldier — the man under fire is Thompson, who first appeared in “Amazing Fantasy” issue No. 15, which introduced the world to the arachnid superhero way back in 1962.

“The story we have and the ending of that story are something that we hope will show what it is really like for these real-life heroes risking their lives in Iraq,” Guggenheim said. “Does he make it out? Well, it is combat and it is dangerous. Bad things happen. When I first told the editors my idea for the ending, I thought there was no chance. But everyone embraced it. I don’t want to give the ending away but it does change things in a very major way.”

Look, I don’t want to say anything about our soldiers or the war (let’s not go there, people), but is anyone going to weep for Flash Thompson? Will Peter Parker even give a shit, other than feeling guilty for feeling happy that the asshole who gave him swirlies in high school kicked the bucket?

Moreover, while there’s certainly a place for commentary on war in general and war in particular in popular culture, I can’t help but think The Amazing Spider-man probably isn’t it. It’s not like Spidey’s going to go over there and fight, and narrowly miss webbing a rocket aimed at Flash by some insurgent (Lord, I hope not, at least). It won’t have anything to do with Spider-man, other than Peter once knew him. So it’s basically killing off an nth-tier character just to say “war is bad and sad,” which, to me, smacks of bad taste and an opportunistic grab for attention.

Of course, if Peter stays as retarded as he has been these past few years, he’ll immediately go to Mephisto and trade something ridiculous for Flash’s life, like his powers or a stack of Magic: The Gathering cards.