Final Crisis Finally Gets Final

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The seventh and final issue of Final Crisis comes out today, and while I’d like to give you some kind of huge spoiler from it, I’ve been scouring the internet highway all morning, and I can’t for the life of me figure out what the fuck happened. So instead, enjoy this page, courtesy of a five-page preview from Newsarama (conservatives, don’t freak out — this is an alternative universe Supes, natch). If any of you Topless Roboteers bought the issue and think you can explain what happened without your or our heads exploding, please do so in the comments.