Coin-ops were known for their sound effects–the boops,
beeps, ba-da-DA-das, and wakka-wakka-wakkas.But a few years into the coin-op boom of the early 80s came
something new to add to the arcade soundtrack: voices.This when digitized speech was
something new and pretty amazing in gaming.It’s no coincidence that a lot of the early digital
voicework in these games was devoted to getting you to give up your quarter;
these voices worked, and well. Games had already earned reputations for being quarter-eaters; with the
advent of voice technology, the games could actually taunt you for it, too.
Here, a baker’s dozen of the voices emanating from your
coin-op arcade–the ones that haunted your dreams, called for your quarters…and
eventually made arcade managers turn the damn things off.
13)“Blast Off!” – Bosconian
Ah, the cries of “Alart! Alart!” The voice for this classic 1981 game sounds
sort of like Steven Hawking’s speech synthesizer, if it was raised in Jersey. And
was sort of pissed at you. I said Blast
off, you fuckin’ mook.
12)“Dragon’s Lair! A
fantasy adventure where you become a valiant knight on a quest to rescue the
fair princess from the clutches of an evil dragon.” – Dragon’s Lair
Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.