?While not widely accepted, true nerds know it to be true: the Donna Karan fashion show and Home Shopping Network aren’t the only places for mad accessorizing. While items found at those particular venues might dazzle on the runway or make the other moms jealous at the annual barbecue, nobody has an eye for bling — arm-bling to be exact — like the men, women and creatures of our favorite nerd fables. And while they couldn’t be less real — just like the characters who adorn them — they’re still incredibly awesome, and incredibly high on our personal “what we must wear on our arms before we die” lists, or they would be if we ever get around to writing them, anyway. Whether they assist in taking down the bad guys, ‘slinging between buildings, transforming into otherworldly beings, or just calling for backup, here are our picks for the very best wrist wear in nerdom.
8) Wonder Woman’s Indestructible Bracelets
Subtle yet effective, Wonder Woman’s bracelets pack a double punch by being both stylish and bulletproof. Of course, the amazin’ amazon fights crime in a patriotic swimsuit with a glowing lasso, so fashion experts would probably have a hard time saying the same about the rest of her ensemble. Don’t worry D, we still love you.
7) Yu-Gi-Oh’s Duel Disks
If our lives revolved around a real-life game of Magic: The Gathering where losing all of our life points meant losing our souls, or whatever, we would definitely want this deck loading, card dispensing monstrosity on our arms. And while it won’t win you any “coolest guy” contests if you wear it to school, since your success in Yu-Gi-Oh’s world seems to correlate directly with how dramatically you play a Blue Eyes White Dragon, you’d definitely be the Fonz of casting ridiculous holographic card game avatars with one of these equipped, if you, ya know, lived in a cartoon.
6) Michael Knight’s Communicator Watch
?Fans of the original Knight Rider TV show already know that this timepiece-supreme had a lot going for it other than just looking ridiculously sweet and being worn by The Hoff. Of its multiple applications, Michael could use it to converse with and summon K.I.T.T, open locks, and transmit audio and video. It even has excellent nerd pedigree – its design is widely believed to have been based on an old Star Wars AM radio watch.
5) Batman’s Gauntlets
4) Penny’s Wristwatch
?Penny’s wristwatch shares a lot in common with Michael Knight’s, but trumps it in the function department. While it comes with a video screen which she can use in part to communicate with Brain, most importantly the watch comes with a freaking built-in laser, proving that Inspector Gadget’s niece is not a crime stopper to be taken lightly. It’s a good thing too, since the good Inspector would be up shit’s creek without her. Oh well, we’ll (fail to) get you next time Gadget.
3) The Power Rangers’ Morphers and Communicators
?Since not all of the Rangers’ morphers were mounted on their wrists, they get to share an entry with the spandex-clad warriors’ truest contribution to this list: their original Power Rangers communicators. While on the surface they appear to be merely ultra compact color-coordinated wireless wrist radios with an excellent ringtone (still pretty cool for 1993), these bad boys came equipped with one defining feature: the ability to transport the rangers anywhere they needed to go by tapping into the Command Center’s teleportation system. We’ll take that over multitasking any day, thanks.
2) Ben 10’s Omnitrix Ben 10 fan to appreciate the fact that Ben Tennyson wears one supremely awesome piece of technology on his arm. Having been created by alien scientist Azmuth to help species live as other life forms and learn from one another, Ben uses the Omnitrix to transform into said species to fight the bad guys. Outside of letting the wearer take the form of over a million different alien beings, the device also features a GPS, defense system, teleportation capabilities, rage-recharge, universal translator, and Pez dispenser. Okay, maybe not the Pez part, but wouldn’t that be a delicious way to fight crime?
1) Spider-Man’s Web-Shooters
?Back before Sam Raimi brought Spidey to the ultra-mainstream and convinced the uninitiated that Spider-Man could shoot webbing out of his wrists right from the get-go, comic book Peter Parker actually had to design and construct a pair of web-slinging gauntlets, termed web-shooters, on a budget to expel webbing on command. While Peter has since gained the ability to create webbing naturally, and eventually returned to the web-shooters, it’s hard to argue how well these fit in with what makes Spider-Man Spider-Man, and that he’s incomplete without them. The fact that they look so tantalizingly realistic and possible for us to construct in our own bedrooms while Aunt May makes us dinner forces us to love them even more.