TR Contest: Your Nerd Epitaph
This Daily List was suggested by Ace of Knaves, and it’s a good ‘un. What would you like on your tombstone? What fact, belief or achievement do you want to commemorate your nerdy life for all eternity?
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?Stupid kids that don’t exist. THOSE HE-MAN FIGURES WILL PROVIDE FOR YOUR FUTURE.
So that’s it. You don’t have to go to the trouble of making an image like I did (I’ll likely do that myself with the winners), just post your epitaph in the comments. It should be obvious you only get one entry per person, since you only die once (unless you’re a Marvel or DC character, of course). Also, don’t make them too long, or both the gravestone and my patience runs out — I’d say about 80 characters is your max — and that’s letters, not words. The contest ends at 12:01 am EST on Monday, June 7th. Also, anyone who uses the phrase “Swift Sausage” in their epitaph will be immediately disqualified. You know why.
About The Author
Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.