Super Terrific Japanese Thing: Beau Bust Roller

I was all set to feature the Beauty Nose — a totally different nose attachment from the Beauty Lift High Nose I ran a few weeks ago, but also designed to reshape your schnozz by clamping it down with a butterfly clips for only five minutes a day — but then I saw this:

?
The Beau Bust Roller. The description from Japan Trend Shop:

Using Electronic Muscle Stimulation (EMS), the Beau Bust Roller
can be used to stimulate breast growth and firmness. It even works in
the bath! Simply sit back and relax in the tub, and roll the device over
your chest to encourage the results you want. Use the included bust
cream to enhance the experience!

Notice: Should not be used by pregnant women or people using pacemakers or electronic medical equipment.

I’ve said this before when discussing one of Japan’s other ridiculous breast-growing technologies, but if tits actually got bigger through groping and rubbing cream on them, I’m pretty sure guys would’ve noticed well before 2011. Hell, I was performing experiments back in 1991, and my results were inconclusive at best. Ladies, you can order the Beau Bust Roller here for $107. Or you can save your money and ask pretty much any guy you know to cop a feel.