Professor X: Before the Dickery
It’s yet another clip from X-Men: First Class, this time showing Lil’ Professor X and the utterly nightmarish Lil’ Mystique upon their first meeting as tots. As it turns out, Chuck’s mother didn’t make him hot chocolate as a kid, which is why Charles had to toss Banshee out of windows and trade Beast to an insurance agent school when he grew up. It all makes sense now. Incidentally, can I tel you how I think this conversation from the clip ends?
Xavier: And here you are. Charles Xavier.
Mystique: Raven.
Xavier: Raven what?
Mystique: Raven Darkholme.
Xavier: …
Mystique: What?
Xavier: Get out.
Mystique: Huh? Why?
Xavier: I’m happy to have found another mutant, but by god I will not have a Vampire: The Masquerade LARPer in my house. Just “obfuscate” your blue ass out the same way you came in, honey.
Thanks to Kiekan for the tip.
About The Author
Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.