Video Games

The WiiU Doesn’t Work Yet



?I have quite the reputation as a Nintendo hater among people who really, really love Nintendo. It’s not true, but I do think Nintendo’s been resting on their laurels — sure, they made the Wii and its motion controls, but they never really figured out how to do anything cool with it after Wii Sports, and since then they’ve just been churning out their core franchises without any real innovation as per usual. But I — wait a second. I do kind of hate Nintendo, actually. For the reasons I just described. I’m sorry, Nintendo fanboys. You’re correct. Because I’m taking way too much delight in the rumors that the WiiU, Nintendo’s next “revolutionary” new console, doesn’t even work yet. From Kotaku:

According to 01Net‘s report, the hardware powering the Wii U
simply isn’t up to scratch to do what Nintendo needs it to: Namely, run
not just the console, but beam data to its fancy touch-screen
controller as well. Apparently developers working on the console are
having to use “tethers” to ensure serviceable communication between the
Wii U and its controller, but even then things still aren’t working that
well, and progress is reportedly halted daily with repeated software
updates for the pad.

The source spilling the beans–who, given the publication, sounds like
it could be a European third-party developer–also says that these
problems have caused a delay in the console’s launch, an original June
2012 release now being pushed back to sometime around September.

Now, this is obviously a rumor, but since Nintendo rushed out the Wii with pretty shoddy motion controls — shoddy enough they had to release the Wii Controller Plus stuff later to match the superior motion controls of the Kinect and Move — this seems imminently reasonable to me. Anyone disagree? Besides the Volunteer Nintendo PR Corps?

About Author

Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.