Super Terrific Japanese Thing: Face Slimmer Exercise Mouthpiece

From Japan Trend Shop for a mere $80:

To get and maintain the perfect visage, you don’t need the cosmetic surgeon’s knife. All you need is a mouthpiece. Yes, the Face Slimmer
is a simple solution to the timeless problem of how to give sagging
facial skin and muscles that much-needed daily lift. Just three minutes
per day is all you need; pop in the mold and then make mouth movements.
The makers recommend you say vowel sounds out loud over and over again,
producing regular and methodical exercises that will strength the twelve
facial expression muscles in a comprehensive way.

Face Slimmer Exercise Mouthpiece

Fight wrinkles around your eyes and help shape the overall look of
your face, whether in front of the mirror, in the bath or at any other
convenient time every day. The movements are given extra load by the
mold, forcing everything to work a bit harder and resulting in more
youthful, vibrant faces.

Face Slimmer Exercise Mouthpiece
I believe with every fiber of my being that this is not for “mouth exercises” but for men who suddenly have sexual partners but who have been jerking off into onaholes and Fleshlights for so long they can no longer reach orgasm with a living, breathing human. Tell me I’m wrong. SERIOUSLY, PLEASE TELL ME I’M WRONG