The Wheel of Time Finally Rolls to a Halt Next Year
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?Good news for you poor bastards who are still slogging through Robert Jordan’s Wheel of Time series — the final novel now has a release date. The Memory of Light will be released on January 8th, 2013, written by Brandon Sanderson from Robert Jordan’s massive pile of Cheetos-stained notes for his dawdling, misogynistic fantasy epic. Admittedly, I stopped reading Wheel of Time after the sixth volume, Lord of Chaos, in which nothing happened over the course of 700 or so pages — so I don’t know if Sanderson has stayed true to Robert Jordan’s original vision of a magical land where women are only bitches or sluts (although they tend to switch in-between books). All I know is that Robert Jordan died with both hands stuck in Pringles containers. And that I won’t be reading The Memory of Light in 2013. (Via Geeks of Doom)
About The Author
Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.