Movies

Alice Cooper Got Kicked by Bigfoot

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The most important cinematic event of this weekend is not Channing Tatum’s male stripper epic Magic Mike. No, that honor goes to SyFy’s presentation of the Asylum’s Bigfoot movie, which stars Danny Bonaduce from The Partridge Family, Greg Brady from The Brady Bunch and a wonderfully shitty CG Bigfoot that seems to be about 30-feet tall. Of course, that makes it sound like it’s just another shitty low-budget monster movie starring former diametrically pop culture stars, which it is. But it’s a shitty low-budget monster movie starring former diametrically pop culture stars in which a 30-foot CG Bigfoot kicks a screaming Alice Cooper like a goddamn soccer ball. And if that’s not more entertaining than watching Channing Tatum strip to his skivvies, I don’t know what is.

About Author

Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of io9.com. Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.