The Mario Bros. Are Better Plumbers Than Financial Planners

Of course, the Mario Bros. aren’t particularly great plumbers, really — as I recall they seem to think it mostly involves murdering turtles, crabs and flies. Still, at least now we know how much actual U.S. money a coin in the Mushroom Kingdom is worth, although that makes Mario’s money-grabbing antics in New Super Mario Bros. 2 even more crass. Go ahead, you bastard, flaunt your wealth while I can’t afford to put a goddamn Portobello mushroom in a question mark box. MARIO IS THE 1%. Thanks to Brian F. for the tip.