Video Games

Dishonored’s Kills Aren’t Honorable, But They Are Hilarious


The new preview for Dishonored is here, focusing on “Creative Kills,” and when they say “creative” they clearly mean “hilariously cruel.” When possessing your enemies the instant they fire their weapon, so you can move them into the line of fire of their own bullet/explosive/whatever isn’t the most dickish thing you can do, you know you have a rather special game on your hands. No, I’d say the most dickish thing you can do, at least as evidenced in this trailer, is “Death by Rat,” in which you pause time, create a swarm of rats,  cast some kind of blade magic on a specific rat, possess said rat, walk up to a group of enemies, and then basically explode in a swirling nightmare of invisible knives is the most dickish thing you can do. Oh, sure, you could simply have the rats attack them, you could pause time and kill the enemies easily, or you could just cast the fucking blade magic, but no, you have to do an elaborate procedure of all three. YOU DON’T EVEN LET THE ASSHOLES SEE YOUR EXPLODING RAT. Now that’s some impressive dickery right there.

About Author

Robert Bricken is one of the original co-founders of the site formerly known as Topless Robot, and its first editor-in-chief, serving from 2008-12. He brought the site to prominence with “nerd news, humor and self-loathing” as its motto, raising it from total internet obscurity to a readership in the millions, with help from his savage “FAQ” movie reviews and Fan Fiction Fridays. Under his tenure Topless Robot was covered by Gawker, Wired, Defamer, New York magazine, ABC News, and others, and his articles have been praised by Roger Ebert, Avengers actor Clark Gregg, comedian and The Daily Show correspondent John Hodgman, the stars of Mystery Science Theater 3000 and Rifftrax, and others. He is currently the managing editor of Despite decades as both an amateur and professional nerd, he continues to be completely unprepared for either the zombie apocalypse or the robot uprising.