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Geek Apparel Gone Bad: Awkward Darth Vader Boxers


I know you’ve said to yourself, at one point or another, “Self, I’d like Darth Vader’s face on my crotch. But not in that way. Like, looking outward from my crotch.” Hey, my mother always told me to wear breathable fabrics, and what’s more blatantly breathable than the loudest mouth-exhaler in the history of cinema aside from maybe Gojira?

It’s not a goal to be ashamed of. But I would tend to think twice about achieving it with these:

vaderboxers.jpg

Where do we start with this? How about the fact that Obi-Wan Kenobi looks like Pony-One KeDerpy? Rather than solemnly telling Darth to strike him down, he would appear by his expression to be singing the Chipmunks’ “Christmas Song.”

But the real hilarity here – and I have to think it was at least partially intentional – is the fact that the words “Feel the power of the dark side” will directly cover your butt crack. Because no side is darker than the back side, where the sun don’t shine, right? And if you get too close to that side you will, er, “feel its power.” This officially makes it the first Star Wars clothing I’ve ever seen that contains a fart joke – unless there’s a Jar Jar “Pee Yousa!” shirt somewhere that I’m mercifully oblivious to.