Ask Luke’s Mother-in-Law: How Realistic Is Battlefield Hardline?


Martha Boyd is not just Luke’s mother-in-law – she’s also an ex-cop, a landlord, a self-described crazy cat lady, a major Star Trek geek and the widow of a green beret. So go ahead: ask her anything. And we mean anything. Just be polite when you do.

Happy Thursday all. Hope you have all had a great week so far and are looking forward to the weekend; I know I am. Last week I posted about the new nail polish I tried, and one comment was I should have done the Vulcan salute. So here it is. As you can see the polish did not last 2 weeks, as advertised – it was really great for about a week and then started to fall apart between last week and this week’s rants. But it did last longer than any other polish that I have ever tried. So I would buy it again.

This week, kittens Pirate and LoveBug had a date with the vet and they are wearing the cones of shame, which lasted for about 5 minutes when we got home. They kept pulling the things off so I checked with my vet tech friend and she said to lose the cones. They have been just fine all day today. They turned out to both be little girls – so Mr. Frizzy is still the top boy in the house. He was so sad when the kids went in the carry cage in the morning. Then he moped around all day until they came home. Back to his old self when his babies were returned.

Now on to the races.


Did you actually hit your husband with the ham? It sounds heavy and maybe messy.

He jumped out of the way before it struck. It was semi-frozen and still in the bag. There were a couple of water marks on the wood floor where it bounced. So he was not really hit, but he got the point loud and clear. That was the last time he made the mistake; he trained well. The ham was about a 10 pounder, it was for just the 2 of us.

Hi Martha:
I work in a “kid-friendly” office where people can bring their kids in. I don’t mind this, because I like kids. But one of these kids is a little goddamned monster. He’s ten years old and if he hasn’t had a run-in with the police he will soon enough. Pushy, violent and nasty. My cubicle is right outside his father’s office so while his old man is in a meeting I feel like I’m the one who has to ride herd on him. I don’t think this is fair to me because nowhere in my job description is “babysitter” listed. How do you think I should handle this? I don’t feel like I have the authority to read the kid the riot act (which is what I would do if it were one of my own kids) but I’m trying to concentrate and the kid is bouncing off the walls. What would you do? What would Pete Malloy do?

I have only worked in one office were kids were allowed, except for 1 time a year when we had “take a kid to the office” day. When we first started appraising, we were in an office and the owner (not us yet) brought their baby to work. I also brought Julia to work – they were about the same age. The car seat fit under the desk and we each had private offices with a door to close so we would not bother anyone.

I bet you are happy summer vacation is over, and hopefully the little darling is back in school. Is there human resorces at your work so you could speak with them? Can you be moved to a different cubby? How about a folding screen that you could put up to keep it out? Have you thought of opening the front door and hopefully it will escape? Maybe even sit down on the ground and be bratty right along with them. The boss is alway going to think the little junior mint is just a dear. But maybe just yelling out STOP would scare the crap out of the kid – it might be so unexpected. Good luck

Gordon Ramsey has restaurants in Las Vegas, does he not? Do you know what they are called? Have you heard anything about which one might be the best one to try as a casual diner? Do you think he ever just pops in on one of his kitchens? Or his his involvement in these places just a licensing thing where they give him money to use his name?

Yes, he has one at the Paris on the strip it is Gordon Ramsay Steak, and over at Planet Hollywood there is Gordon Ramsey Burger. Burger is more on the casual side from what I understand, and so you might give that a try first.

As I have never been so lucky to eat at any of Mr. Ramsay’s. I can only say that LYT and Julia went to one in Los Angeles – they raved for days about the great service and great food; it was truly a treat. Ah, someday some nice guy will ask me out to dinner and say price is no object – yeah sure.

As for Mr. Ramsay showing up…considering all of the time he spends doing TV in both the US and England, I doubt he gets to any of the restaurants very often, but that would be so great to have him on the line when you are in the place.

Do you think dogs and cats can live together? If so, what’s the best way to make that work?

Yes, yes, yes. I have always had dogs and kitties. Even kitties and wolfies. It was hard introducing a baby to the pack. The best way is to get everyone around the same age, but when does that work?.

The cats seem to know how to take charge and get the dogs/wolves in line from the get go. Any start of a bite generally gets a claw on the nose. Dogs learn pretty fast on this issue. With the wolves, they were about 6 months to a year when we got them and the cats were already in place. We made sure they were fed and told the wolves that the cats were not food. For the first few nights they were not sleeping in the same room and someone was generally home just to make sure. We had one wolf that when he was out in the yard was actually caught with a bunny snuggled up against his back legs; both were sound asleep. Make sure the bigger animal is well fed and then they generally don’t have an interest in the cat as food.

which marx brother is yer favorite?

I always loved Harpo. He was so talented and never said a word. Loved him when he was on Lucy – still love to see that show. His comedy was spot on, the best of the group.


[EDITOR’S NOTE: The following question and answer with Martha were originally intended to run as part of Robotic Gaming Monthly. As we all decided it was loaded with so much content already, I’ve slotted it here – LYT]

Kyle LeClair:
Basically, I was planning some stuff for discussion in my next gaming column, & saw an article noting the upcoming game Battlefield Hardline and how it is glorifying the use of a militarized police force, especially in light of Ferguson, thus highlighting the fact that Hardline’s premise – attempting to transplant the feel and mechanics of a military shooter into a game about the U.S. police – is insanely stupid on its own.

And as the game will at least partially take place in Los Angeles, I was wondering if you – being a former L.A.P.D. officer – might have any opinions on this kind of a premise. Is Hardline looking like a bad game when it comes to showcasing the nation’s law enforcement? Or are some of us just overthinking this?

Well, I went on several sites and looked at the game. I don’t have PlayStation or the game, but I think I got some idea of what it is about.

To start with, the graphics are stunning. Very real, almost like watching a live-action movie. Sound was good; I could understand the dialogue and the explosions did not get in the way.

However, I would not let anyone under 21 play this. I know it will get into the hands of younger kids as big brother/dad /uncle etc will get the game.

I just don’t like violent video games. I think that they, along with violent movies, etc., are some of the trouble with today’s society. I feel people get desensitized to the violence after all the characters don’t stay dead, which in the real world is a very real thing.

Even when I was working in L.A., the SWAT team had all of the coolest weapons and yes, today they look more and more like the military. I was working L.A. when they first got the Ram. It was great to see that go thru a drug house one day. I knew several members of Metro, which was the SWAT team in L.A. They were great guys and good at their jobs. The idea of SWAT was to command/control and if needed take out the bad guy, save a hostage etc. The snipers were and still are highly trained at their position.

Contrary to today’s beliefs, cops just don’t want to kill the suspect. Trust me, in our legal system that might be easier considering how long court cases take, and the way that people sit in prison forever.

I did not like that it was set in a specific city. It could have been more generic. LAPD are not all a bunch of shoot-em-up cowboys. Most police officers only draw their weapon on the range. However, that is becoming less and less true as more and more of the bad guys feel the need to shoot at cops.

In light of the recent police shootings, thankfully this is not to be realeased until 2015. I think now would be bad timing.

Yes, police even in some small rural areas are starting to look more and more like the real military; unfortunately this is the times we are in. Police departments get many of their weapons, armor vehicles, choppers etc from military surplus – helps on the city budget to buy used.

I feel it was very sad what happened in Ferguson, but we don’t know the entire story yet. Thank heavens that the people of L.A. did not feel the need to riot when we had our latest shooting right around the same time. Because something like this happens, there is no right to riot. L.A. went thru that with Rodney King – it did not help the neighborhoods that the people lived in and burned down. Some of those parts of town never rebuilt. This may also happen in Ferguson.

I think they should keep this kind of game in a military setting or at least a generic setting. In reality most SWAT actions are fairly boring and they tend to sit around for many hours trying to negotiate the situation rather then just go in with guns blazing.

I hope that this was what you were looking for.

Thursday night I am going to the Joshua Tree International Film Fest – at least, that is what it is being called. They are showing 1 film from a festival on the 3rd Thursay of the month. The first one is a documentary on 2 cats. It will take all of 51 minutes and I heard that one of the people in the film will do Q&A after. Big name, little show. They put out a call for volunteers to help with seating, concessions etc.; I volunteered and heard nothing back.

Now, I used to volunteer at out local theater (plays) in box office, concessions, seating etc so I think I can handle this event. which is going to be in a storefront. Nothing. Pet peeve: if you put out a call for volunteers it would at least be nice if you let people know if they are needed or not. Just saying. There was even to be a brief meeting the evening before and nothing. I put in my email to the event that I was also planning to cover the event for Topless Robot. I’m still planning to go, but really, how rude. Well, next week I will let you know how the screening was. Take care all, be good to each other and as always HUGGS

As always, keep your questions coming, be they foolish, philosophical or anything else! Any questions on any topic submitted in comments below will be included in future columns.