ROBOTIC GAMING MONTHLY – The Best-Looking Games of 2015

Artwork by CitrusKing46

Hello and welcome to another edition of Robotic Gaming Monthly, Topless Robot’s monthly look at what the gaming world has to offer recently! Well, now that the new year is officially here, the most logical way to kick things off is with a preview of some of the most interesting games coming out in 2015! Yes folks, this edition contains a little bonus list for the day to top things off! Let it not be said that we don’t offer you the best bang for your buck, after all! So come on in and a take a gander at what the new year has to offer when it comes to video games, along with new game reviews and trailers!

First off all, though, aside from showcasing the best video games of 2014, it seems only logical that we first revisit my quick selection of 2014’s most anticipated games and see how they turned out…

Sunset Overdrive: A terrific, thrilling, vibrant and energetic game that lived up to all of my expectations and ended up being my Game of the Year!!

Murdered: Soul Suspect: Ummm…see the opposite of the above, sadly.

Hyper Light Drifter: Delayed until 2015.

Broken Age: After quite a bit of build-up, I thought Act 1 of Broken Age was terrific and did an amazing job setting up the second episode…which was sadly delayed until 2015, so I can’t truly pass final judgment on it yet.

The Order: 1886: Delayed until 2015.

Transistor: Cracked my list of 2014’s best games, so I’d say it did damn fine.

Dying Light: Delayed until 2015.

Jazzpunk: Honestly, the only thing really keeping Jazzpunk from being one of 2014’s best is that it ended too soon, just as it left you wanting more and more.

The Evil Within: Haven’t gotten around to playing it yet, and depending on the opinions I’ve heard from those who expected a return to pure horror games, that may be a good thing…

Cuphead: *sigh* Delayed until 2015…

…Yeah, it was kind of hard to enjoy the first full year of the eighth video game generation when a lot of the most interesting stuff kept getting pushed back. At the very least, one would hope that this means 2015 will be packed with several excellent games…and yet despite that, as I was preparing this list, I realized that while I could think of several games with a lot of potential coming out this year, I couldn’t think of any one game that could easily top a list like this. Going into 2013, I had BioShock Infinite effortlessly pegged as my number-one must-have upcoming game, and Sunset Overdrive in 2014, but no such case this year…instead, I just have 16 games to look forward to that I guess have to get equal billing. Oh well…anyhow, on with our little look at 2015’s most anticipated games (in my opinion, at least)!!

…Well, at the very least Evolve appears to be every other critic’s sure bet for one of 2015’s big winners, and it’s not hard to see why. A gorgeous-looking first-person shooter from the folks behind Left 4 Dead where you and a squad of friends take down Eldritch aliens controlled by other players attempting to squash you as well? Yeah, I can easily get behind any game where you get a chance to play as a miniature kaiju.

No Man’s Sky
I think part of the reason we’re all anticipating No Man’s Sky is just to see if it can live up to the hype. I mean, a game about space exploration featuring a near-infinite amount of planets to explore, creatures to encounter, resources to collect, and adventures to have is quite a feat. If they can pull this off, it’ll be a blast indeed…even more so if we get to name the planets we discover. Dibs on Planet Fartwiener.

Alright, Nintendo, I purchased a Wii U this year because of games like Splatoon, a colorful kid-friendly shooter with a unique central mechanic of ink splatters as a way of combat and means of travel, because that suggested you were finally ready to take chances and bet on creative new IPs again. So while everything looks good so far, do not let me down here.

As I may have said before, Screamride appears to be a next-gen version of Roller Coaster Tycoon, except now you are encouraged to fling people attending your park off of half-finished coasters and cause massive amounts of damage as a result. It sounds like a sleeper hit as is, but throw in the ability to crash into theme park mascots with the rides and we may have a classic on our hands.


Well, From Software has already delighted and tortured you so far with incredibly difficult yet captivating medieval fantasy games, so why not let them take a shot at some Victorian Gothic-inspired horror this time around? After all, I’m in for any fun game that lets you kill monsters by swinging around giant blades as big as the punishment the game doles out.

The Beta version alone has already become one of Steam’s most beloved indie games, according to the user reviews, so I can’t wait to see what the final version will be like. At the very least we get an old-school action game where you can have Snake Plissken and Ash team up to annihilate as many tanks as humanly possible, among countless other scenarios designed to fulfill your raving inner child’s fantasies.

Damn, does it feel like we’ve been waiting a while for Epic Games’ new shooter, one that apparently aims to do a bit of a 180 from their Gears of War games. Then again, considering that this is a game where I can play as a ninja who can loot a burger joint to gather the materials need to craft a fort that can fend off an invasion of demonic monsters, I’d wager this’ll be more than likely worth the wait.

Yes, the folks behind the indie darling Limbo are back with the game’s spiritual sequel, a new dark platformer to undoubtedly creep you out with…albeit this one giving off hints of a more 1984-esque vibe as you creep around a dystopia trying not to get killed. Eerie yet fascinating; I can’t wait to see more of it.

No Man’s Sky

Mad Max
After a terrific showing in 2013 that wowed a lot of people, Mad Max was bizarrely MIA for most of 2014…but with Fury Road set to (hopefully) blow moviegoers away next year, here’s hoping we get more info soon on a game that could be as good as the film. After all, the Mad Max series has inspired a lot of bits in modern action games, so why not let the original show them how it’s done with the ultimate apocalyptic open world title?

Ori and the Blind Forest
This unbelievably gorgeous “Metroidvania” has been four years in the making, and its debut preview last year suggested all that time was indeed spent creating an unforgettable experience influenced by classic Super Nintendo games and Studio Ghibli films. So yeah, needless to say, the final product is easily one of this year’s most highly-anticipated indie games.

Quantum Break
Defiance may not have been the greatest success when it came to creating a video game/TV show hybrid, but Quantum Break looks like it aims to be a ton more ambitious on the game front. So here’s hoping Remedy delivers again when it comes to creating a quality action game, this one based around time manipulation, because it definitely seems promising.

Just Cause 3
…Because it wouldn’t be a truly great year for video games unless we had at least one colorful open-world game where the goal is to dick around as much as possible. And it doesn’t get any better in that area than using an improved grappling gun to fire an enemy thirty feet into the air by attaching him to a flagpole. God bless you, Rico Rodriguez.

Titan Souls
It might be inaccurate to describe Titan Souls as Shadow of the Colossus 2, but if it gets you all to play a game as challenging and as interesting as this…yeah sure, it’s totally Shadow of the Colossus 2. A version from 1992 that can also be compared to Dark Souls in some areas and where you have one single arrow instead of a sword, but SotC2 nonetheless.


The Tomorrow Children
Okay, so imagine a combination of Minecraft, communism, and Knowhere from Guardians of the Galaxy…and I’m pretty sure you’re still not even close to describing what The Tomorrow Children is all about, but it’s a start. You certainly can’t say that the latest from the folks behind the PixelJunk games looks like it’ll be boring, that’s for sure.

The Flame in the Flood
I don’t know exactly who it was that suggested that we need a roguelike survival version of Toobin’ that also doubles as a Beasts of the Southern Wild game made by ex-BioShock developers, but whoever you are…THANK YOU. One of the most intriguing games to pop up on Kickstarter in the past year, The Flame in the Flood looks like a bizarre blast of fun indeed.

You would think that a game where you play as a fire lookout in the wilderness of Wyoming would be boring, but then again, we also said that about being a border guard for a communist country in a game before as well. Besides, Firewatch looks like a mysterious first-person adventure that delves into a journey full of madness and paranoia, and that’s enough of a tease to get me interested.

…Well, that wraps up a look at some of the most intriguing upcoming games coming out this year, but as this is only scratching the surface when it comes to the subject, I guess that makes for a pretty easy topic to use for this month’s Burning Question: What video game (or games) are you looking forward to the most in 2015? Let us know in the comments, answer with as many games as you like, and feel free to even speculate on what games you think or even hope will come out this year.

And since the introduction of the Burning Question seemed to be a pretty decent success, I figured it would be best to reward you all for responding to it!…Or at the very least, give a random Roboteer who answered the question a Mystery prize! So congratulations to Anyone00, you win the Mystery Prize for last month’s Burning Question! Please contact us at [email protected] to claim your prize! And here’s hoping 2015 is a damn good year for video games!

Next up: Review time!!

Well, they usually say December is a slow month for video game releases, but even having to fill things out with a review of a slightly older game, there was a nice crop of titles to still work with, so let’s go!

Alien: Isolation

Well, no sense leaving this one on the back-burner any longer. I had said that my Alien: Isolation review would be delayed because I felt I hadn’t gotten enough time with it to leave a proper impression on me. And now having spent some more time with it, I can definitely say the game left one big impression on me indeed…

…In that the game kept kicking my ass, because I suck at Alien: Isolation.

Maybe I’m just not that good at survival horror, but the game’s lone xenomorph kept creeping up on me and instantly killing me all the time. Hell, one time I only escaped its clutches due to a slight glitch. Nonetheless, it is quite the formidable and creepy creature indeed…it’s just so unnerving to walk around a ruined space station, thinking that every single creak you encounter could be ol’ Mr. Phallushead, ready to rip you a new one, and even when you’ve found a hiding spot and think you can just wait for it to pass, you’re still sweating bullets over the thought of that seven-foot monstrosity yanking you out and disemboweling you with its tail, over and over and over again…I know it sounds silly, but it honestly does get quite scary without losing its impact each time, to the point where you’re almost afraid to try again…

…Oh my god, that’s it. That’s the perfect review right there: Alien: Isolation is so scary you will actually be afraid to play it. Honestly, what could be a more ringing endorsement for a horror game than that? If it were up to me, I’d stop the review right there, but we do still need to go into more detail, so…

Taking place after the original Alien film, Isolation involves Ripley’s daughter Amanada finally hearing news that a space station known as Sevastopol has picked up the recordings of the Nostromo which could contain details about what happened to her mom, so she hops on a ship sent out by the totally-always-trustable Weyland-Yutani to check them out. When Amanda gets there, though, she finds things on the Sevastopol have gone to hell, there’s trouble going on with her own ship, and did we mention the seven-foot monstrosity? The one crawling around that seeks Amanda out and can kill her at any moment? We did? Good.

Needless to say, Isolation’s greatest strength is in building suspense. Much like in the recent horror game Outlast, your main means of self-defense is sneaking around, hiding, and praying you don’t get spotted by either paranoid survivors, creepy synthetic androids programmed to make sure you don’t intrude at any cost, or our acid-drooling main star. You do have the ability to craft items to help you defend yourself against or distract enemies or even pick up guns with a scarce amount of ammo, but in the end, you will always find yourself cramming your body into a locker, trying you damnedest not to breathe whenever your pursuer walks by because with a threat around every corner, the tensions is high here and built nicely indeed.

In addition, the game perfectly replicates the look and feel of the original Alien film. Oh, not just via darkened spaceship corridors, flickering lights, and creepy sounds that always make you jump a little bit. No, I’m talking about the care and attention given to perfectly mimicking what 1979 thought a sci-fi future would be like: Dot-matrix displays, audio logs left on reel-to-reel tapes, color schemes straight out of the decade, deliberately low-tech machines all around, and an even an old-school 20th Century Fox logo seemingly taken off an early video cassette. It’s just some truly terrific attention to detail that adds a lot of flavor to the game’s world.

Any flaws? Well, while the rest of the game controls smoothly, it is a tad awkward when it comes to throwing noisemakers or other distraction devices, in that you have to hold down the left trigger to aim, or else you end out pulling out your gun instead when you press the right trigger, which can always be annoying when you’re in a situation when you need to get away ASAP. Also, while the story sets up a lot of intrigue, the number of hoops that Amanda has to jump through and objectives to complete to progress through it almost seems a bit ludicrous at times. That being said, Alien : Isolation is one of the year’s best horror games and not one to miss out on. Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go back to sucking my thumb.


True story: Before I was given a code for a review copy of Bliss from the game’s creator, he expressed some concerns, saying “I’m not sure Bliss would fit the content of your website.” I wondered why he could possibly think that a puzzle-platformer revolving around K?bler-Ross’ five stages of grief wouldn’t exactly fit in around here…and then I remembered that our most popular story around here was still the “Pony Jar” and got kind of worried myself. Would a game like this actually go over the heads of us Roboteers?

Well, it turns out gameplay-wise, not really. You play as a little shadow travelling through a strange world built out of a person’s memories armed with nothing but a watch that can stop time and a boomerang to help stop enemies or bypass obstacles. Aside from stretches of your traditional platforming exercises, the main goal in Bliss is get rid all of all the dark creatures in an area before you can advance, which can only be achieved when time is stopped, at which point you have mere moments to get rid of them.

The real trick here, you see, is setting up the perfect scenario to clear the whole area in the limited amount of time given, and this is where Bliss gets to set up some nicely-designed puzzles. Each level introduces its own twists, from spiked areas that you can only cross by freezing your boomerang in mid-air and using it as a platform, to enemies that only become active the second time is stopped, or pits that end up dropping you through the top of the screen, among other things. It does make for a good amount of variety, and the difficulty increases at a nice and steady rate. You character is also easy to control, though the occasional “floaty” bit can annoyingly lead you to miss or slip off of a ledge on occasion.

Visually, the game is also well done, with the look of each stage of grief having its own unique angle: Denial is a sugar-coated candy land, Anger is a warzone ravaged by fire and demons, Bargaining is a frozen, cold glacier, et cetera. The story is also nicely presented in dialogue-free bits at certain points, and is interesting while being simple enough to follow. The one aesthetic choice I could have done without, though, is having to see your character ghostly float back to the last checkpoint whenever you die, which took up to several seconds depending on the situation and got a bit increasingly annoying as the game went on.

So long story short, Bliss is indeed a particularly good little platformer that I can easily recommend checking out. Now I just hope we don’t have any particularly perverted news stories soon to distract from this opinion…


You know, the only real problems I have with games that I describe as “Simple, yet genius” is that they’re usually some of the hardest titles to do detailed reviews about. And with that, I suddenly realize that I just spoiled my overall opinion about Kalimba right here in the opening paragraph of the review. Dang. Well, let’s proceed anyway…

The setup for Kalimba is unsurprisingly simple as well, as an evil shaman attacks an island and a mystic spirit now has to possess totems in order to reawaken several larger, more legendary totems in order to reclaim the island. The catch is that two totems are used at a time and both move in unison, meaning you essentially have to play two games at once and pay attention to all of your surroundings, like whether or not you’re about to send a totem walking into a floating skull or a color-coded section that makes a particular totem go kablooey.

So as you may have guessed, this makes for a nice set of rather challenging puzzles, requiring both intuitiveness and quick reflexes to successfully navigate everything in your path. Things get hard (particularly in collecting every item and beating a level without dying in order to earn a golden totem), but thankfully never unfair, even when it comes to autoscrolling boss battles or the trickier segments that require extremely quick gravity manipulation.

I haven’t even gotten to the visuals yet, which are a true highlight for the game. The idea to use characters and scenery built entirely out of triangular and hexagonal figures is a genius one indeed, creating an incredibly unique and vibrant art style that makes everything pop out at you. The totems themselves also have several cute little expressions and personalities that bring them to life, and it’s pretty damn fun to see. Not so much for Hoebear, your guide throughout everything, whose “meta” cracks feel a tad out of place after a bit and can get annoying (Yes, Hoebear, I know achievement collecting can be silly, but SHUT UP).

Overall, Kalimba is an absolutely incredible little puzzle-platformer that I heavily endorse. A fun little game with a heart as big as the totem poles you can build in it.

The Talos Principle

…Yes, I know this seems a tad redundant given that I’ve already declared The Talos Principle to be one of the best games of 2014 and mentioned exactly why it deserved that honor right there. But I suppose a little more elaboration might be needed, so let’s get to that…

The Talos Principle is a first-person puzzler where you play as a recently-awakened robot hearing a booming voice from above known as ELOHIM who says he’s your creator, and then encourages you to explore a bunch of ruins to collect as many sigils as you want, as long as you don’t enter the unbelievably massive tower, in which case there will be hell to pay. Yep, nothing suspicious about that. Indeed, as you move throughout these ruins (and as they glitch and flicker out), you come across various documents and recordings suggesting that s*** kind of went down a long time ago, and it’s up to you to decide how much information about this world you want to uncover.

So as for the actual game, collecting the sigils involves navigating a massive series of puzzles/slash obstacle courses, where you have to use all the tools given to you to retrieve them: jammers to shut down electronic devices, devices to redirect lasers in order to open gates, crates to reach higher ground, and many more you can unlock. Oh, and I suppose I should really mention the floating mines, mounted miniguns, and other devices set to turn you into spare parts that you need to maneuver around. Really though, nothing I could say can really do it justice. All of the puzzles are just so elegantly designed and incredibly challenging in the best ways possible, so you pretty much need to see it for yourself.

However, some of the most incredible stuff comes outside of the puzzles, where you get to explore massive hub worlds containing both some of the most stunning visuals you will see all year that replicate the remains of ancient civilizations, and several details and information concerning the people who were here before you. Be it computer terminals containing documents from people e-mailing each other witticisms, files about various experiments, and documented history lessons, QR codes on the walls you automatically scan from people who have been here before you, or audio messages about time capsules and the nature of man and their puzzles, they all goes towards creating an amazing (and even comedic) experience in an unforgettable world.

Damn, I can’t think of any actual flaws I’ve encountered so far…really, you just need The Talos Principle, plain and simple. Trust me: when I said it was the spiritual successor to the Portal games, I meant it.

This War of Mine

Earlier this year, UNICEF pitched an idea for a fake video game called Elika’s Escape where you play as a seven year-old girl attempting to survive in war-torn South Sudan, meant to draw attention to the real-life plights in the country. It didn’t seem, though, that UNICEF considered that some people might actually want to play such a game in order to get an even better understanding of how war affects countless innocent civilians. In fact, if they’d have waited they would have been able to play such a game indeed: This War of Mine, inspired by the 1992-96 Siege of Sarajevo.

At the beginning, you control a group of three civilians holed up in a large house in a war-torn country, with the simple goal of using whatever you can dig up to survive. You begin by simply scrounging around the house, but eventually you have to send someone out to scavenge and find materials during the night. It starts out easily enough, looting the occasional abandoned house, but then you come across other hostile survivors, armed forces, and other innocent civilians just trying to survive as well who need their supplies.

Needless to say, things turn into a game of hard choices quite fast, and what lengths you may go to in keeping your group alive will be tested. It started out easy for me, crafting a bed and chairs to keep my guys comfortable, shovels and crowbars to clear debris, a furnace to heat the place, rat traps to get meat, a stove to cook it on, et cetera…but as they had started to become wounded, sleepless, and sick due to scavenging for material and guarding the place, I actually found myself attempting to steal from a still-operational hospital just to get the goods they needed to live for one more day. It didn’t get any better when I found myself killing two hostile men with a shovel just because they didn’t want me intruding, but we desperately needed food. For all of my attempts to hang on to my humanity during this war – helping out neighbors with their requests for survival skills as well, taking in additional survivors who needed shelter, giving medicine to those begging for it – I could feel it slowly being stripped away.

The defining moment came for me during a scavenging, where, after I had failed to get what I needed at a black market, I sneaked into a nearby building and into an underground catacomb below, stocked with food, medicine, materials and a gun I could barter with. Alas, on my way back after grabbing what I could, I noticed the door I had entered from was locked now, and in my attempt to crowbar it open alerted the residents within. It did not end well, and one of my survivors died right there, carrying what I thought was hope with him. The surviving civilians I had were now saying they had trouble moving on…and I couldn’t blame them, especially after forming connections with all of them.

While some of the game’s crafting recipes and gameplay restrictions seem a bit annoying (why can’t I chop up an old chair to get the wood needed to build a better chair, for example?) and switching between three or more characters can be confusing on occasions, This War of Mine ends of being one of 2014’s big highlights. Powerful, challenging, unforgiving, and thought-provoking, it comes highly recommended beyond a doubt.


Let’s see here…we have Renegade Kid, a company known for more than a few cult classic video games, and they’ve created a new Metroidvania-inspired game, and I have a need to review more games for Nintendo consoles (although this is available on Steam as well as the 3DS eShop)…yep, I knew almost immediately that I would end up having to review Xeodrifter at some point, so let’s see how it all turned out!

Being a nod to an older generation of video games, Xeodrifter keeps its story quick and simple: You are a drifter in space, your warp core has gone boom, and now you have to search four nearby planets for the parts you need to escape. As you explore each area, though, you get to unlock new gadgets and abilities that allow you to access previously unreachable areas. Your standard Metroidvania fare, with one unique twist being the unlockable ability to maneuver around areas by switching between the foreground and background, which makes for a visual treat as well…as do the 8-bit inspired graphics and music that set the tone perfectly.

The gameplay is also nice and simple too, just jump, shoot, and trigger special abilities like turning into a rocket or a submarine when needed. It all works seamlessly, and controls near-perfectly. You also get the option of hunting for upgrades to your guns and health, which involves searching every nook, cranny, and newly-available area for a secret, allowing for a good chunk of exploration…exploration that is unfortunately hindered by the choice to include artificial difficulty.

See, the only times you can save the game are while you’re on your ship – no saving while on a planet – and the only checkpoints you get in-game come before and after boss areas. One slip-up, and it’s back to the start of the level. And while I always admire a good challenge, the fact that you can’t even warp between checkpoints in previously-explored levels, combined with a dire lack of ways to regain health (I swear I found exactly two health power-ups in the whole game, and they were hidden away as secrets) means even just going back to a planet to grab a lone upgrade can become a chore. It just seems like padding to stretch out a game that lasts only a few hours.

Luckily, those were a few good hours indeed, and I would still probably recommend Xeodrifter quite easily to those to need a quick dose of Metroidvania action. Padding (and palette-swapped bosses) aside, it’s still a fun little platformer to give a spin. Just don’t be surprised if you curse at it at least once.

Well, that wraps it up for reviews this month…They always say January is supposed to be slow for new releases as well, but we’ll see what pops up for the next edition…for now, though, on to the trailers!

Yes, I know it seems pretty repetitive to show off more upcoming games when the main attraction in this article was a giant feature about upcoming games, but you do what you need to do…heck, if you want, feel free to consider these honorary games for the list as well! Now, on with the trailers!

Kirby and the Rainbow Curse

The more I see of Kirby and the Rainbow Curse, the more I like it, especially as the successor to Kirby: Canvas Curse, one of the best Kirby games and one of the best DS games in general. That being said, why does the game have a Claymation art style when the main character helping Kirby out here resembles a paintbrush? Kind of seems like we might have gotten our mediums mixed up here, but everything still looks pretty sweet nonetheless.

Aviary Attorney

Dating simulators centered around birds? Psssh, haven’t you heard? Those are so last year. This year it’s all about the lawyer simulators centered around birds, naturally (although whether or not they’ll be handling any bestiality cases from the aforementioned dating simulators has yet to be confirmed). And have them set in mid-19th century Paris, because why not? If this is your thing, the game has already reached its funding goal on Kickstarter, but feel free to chip in during its final days.

Zombie Vikings

…I’m just going to take a wild stab here and say that this game might be about ninjas or something. Seriously though, a comedic hack-and-slash from the same people behind Stick It To The Man!, one of my favorite indie games from the past few years? It goes without saying that I’m in, though I do wish the dialogue wasn’t drowned out that much during the trailer. Still, looks impressive.

Fossil Echo

Fossil Echo is a 2D platformer about one boy’s mysterious quest to climb a massive tower with the whole shebang inspired by (among other things) Ico and Studio Ghibli films. So, much like Ori and the Blind Forest, all of that combined adds up a project that had to be featured here or else, lest the Pretentious Gaming Critics Union kick me out for not being indie enough. Still looks like a mighty awesome game, though.

Drawn to Death

Yes, I know we already featured this trailer before in an article about the PlayStation Experience, but I couldn’t pass up an opportunity to feature it here as well, because David Jaffe’s latest about an arena shooter that takes place in a slacker high school student’s notebook is the kind of twisted game idea we should nurture more often. Anyhow, the whole game looks like a hoot, but if they want to replicate my own high school notebook more accurately, I’m going to need more doodles of beach ball-sized titties, the Dreamcast logo, and lyrics from Californication by the Red Hot Chili Peppers strewn about everywhere.

Fat Princess Adventures

Well, I honestly can’t say I expected this. I mean, the original Fat Princess was a pretty good RTS, but for Sony to suddenly decide to pop out a new game five years later was a bit of a shock. Still, was there really a mob of people demanding a new Fat Princess game or something? We may never know what the thought process behind this was, but at least it looks like we might get a decent hack-and-slash game out of it.


Someone in the YouTube comments for this video described what they saw of Severed as “Infinity Blade + Guacamelee + Fruit Ninja = this!” I honestly could not think of a better way to describe why I am looking forward to this game, so there. On a related note, holy s***, a YouTube comment was actually useful.

Enter the Gungeon

“In the innermost chamber of an ancient and forbidden temple lies a weapon of immeasurable power…A GUN THAT CAN KILL THE PAST!!!” That’ll do, boys, that’ll do. Also, you get to shoot regular bullets at giant bullets that make cute noises. I honestly fail to see any flaws with this setup.

A Good Snowman is Hard to Build

Okay, this a puzzle game where a tiny monster builds perfect snowmen, gives them names, and then hugs them. Unless you are some sort of reincarnation of Hitler, there is no possible way for you to not love the above video. Also, I’m guessing this will fall under the category of “deceptively simple puzzler that I will end up playing for three hours straight,” as it usually seems to be…

Criminal Girls: Invite Only

I’m starting to think that Sony’s overall plans for the Vita basically include turning it into a home for quirky imported Japanese niche titles. Case in point, here’s a game that involves leading a group of delinquent anime girls clad in prison uniforms in an escape from Hell where you have to “motivate” them into fighting along the way, as seen in the video. And as I type these words, I realize that this is starting to sound more and more like a cross between a JRPG and a grindhouse film.

Saints Row: Gat out of Hell

Gonna be honest, I haven’t actually watched this trailer yet…largely because in no way do I want a Saints Row musical number about Johnny Gat and Satan’s daughter spoiled for me. Let’s see if the rest of you can resist temptation, though!

Love You to Bits

From the makers of Tiny Thief comes a point-and-click adventure game about what appears to be a gorgeous and heartwarming journey of a man on a sci-fi quest to retrieve the parts to his robot girlfriend…which, now that I think about it, sounds like a bizarre G-rated remake of Cherry 2000. And that is something I weirdly realize I didn’t want until now…


And thus we reach the end of another edition of Robotic Gaming Monthly. Thanks for dropping by, feel free to leave any comments offering suggestions, questions, additional discussions on what we talked about, or messages about how much we suck, and here’s hoping for terrific new year full of considerably less yelling about video games this time around! See you next time!

Previous Editions of Robotic Gaming Monthly:
– Robotic Gaming Monthly #7 – Press F to Decorate Tree
Robotic Gaming Monthly #6 – Harmonix, Hatred, and an ex-BioShock Bonanza
– Robotic Gaming Monthly #5 – Destiny, Danganronpa, and Death at The Hands of Freddy
Robotic Gaming Monthly #4 – PAX, Gamescom, and Sad Signs O’ The Times