Imagine a cross between the Clash of the Titans remake, Stargate, and not giving a shit, and you apparently have Gods of Egypt. I’m actually somewhat impressed that they’re showing off all these really shaky effects and basically daring us to make fun (comments are actually DISABLED on YouTube).
Also, is that a WWE NXT logo on Anubis’ chest, above? Seriously.
I wonder when the actors finally see this, do they go, “Awww shit, I was imagining looking at something so much better”? Or is it more like, “Yay, I got a paycheck!”? If this thing does well, against all odds, maybe Hasbro will finally develop that Silverhawks movie three of you have possibly been clamoring for, when you think about Silverhawks at all.
Notice I didn’t point out how mostly white all these “Egyptians” are. This is because (a) other sites will go on way bigger rants about that than I ever could and (b) even engaging that point strikes me as giving this movie more credit than it would appear to deserve, as something containing issues worth debating, like any thought was put into it whatsoever. Besides, I think this ends with a giant toothy vagina coming from the sky, and that automatically renders all your arguments irrelevant.
Luke Y. Thompson has been writing professionally about movies and pop-culture since 1999, and has also been an actor in some extremely cheap culty and horror movies you will probably never hear much about (he is nonetheless mostly proud of them, as he met his wife on one). As editor of The Robot's Voice since 2012, he can take the blame for the majority of the site's content, all of which he creates because he loves you very, very much. (Although he loves nachos more. Sorry.)
Prior to TRV, Luke wrote for publications that include the New Times LA, Los Angeles CityBeat, E! Online, OC Weekly, Geekweek, GeekChicDaily, The L.A. Times, The Village Voice, LA Weekly, and Nerdist