And Now, By the Power Programmed In Me, I Pronounce You Meatbag and Meatbag

Japan has created a robot that can marry people called, I shit you not, called the I-Fairy. It married Tomohiro Shibata and Satoko Inoue in Tokyo this past weekend; supposedly both the bride and groom work in the robotics industry and were not forced to use a robot officiant by their evil, publicity-seeking company CEOs at the risk of losing their jobs. Or, to sum up this story more succinctly, “JAPAN STILL BEING JAPAN.” I can’t decide if when the robot uprising happens if it’ll be better to be in Japan, getting married to random strangers and peed on by robot babies, or in America, where you’ll get killed by Terminators, but it will be mercifully quick and ungoofy. Thanks to everyone who sent this tip in.